Funny Math
(this is from a friend who sends me jokes every day)
What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%?
We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 103%? What makes up 100% in life?
Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:
If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
is represented as
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.
Then:
H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K is 8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%
and
K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E is 11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%
But, A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E is 1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%
and
B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T is 2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%
AND, look how far ass kissing will take you:
A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G is 1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%
So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that
While Hard work and Knowledge will get you close,
and Attitude will get you there,
it's the Bullshit and Asskissing that will put you over the top
5 Comments:
Even the sight of numbers makes me turn off!
I am one of those count or your fingers types!!
Can't argue with the math.
Perfect Friday post.
If kissing a$$ doesn't work, there's always brown nosing.
:D Come over and see the baby bunny pics! And you'll love the ghost stories! So will the girls, I think.
That is genius.
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