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Sunday, March 03, 2013

Pain

Pain comes in many forms.

Physically, I'm in a lot of pain and discomfort because of degenerated disk disease. Two disks in the lumbar region that are nearly flattened to nothing, leaving my left leg weak, lacking mobility and painful. I can hardly wait for surgery (April 16). I know that there will be pain from that, too, and physical challenges. But I can't go on this way forever.

My emotional and mental struggles have subsided a little, but only because pain and chronic fatigue have taken over. I am mentally and emotionally weak right now and have succumbed quickly to tears and despair when criticized or "attacked."

There is also the pain of watching, helplessly, while Dad's health deteriorates and Mom's caretaker-burnout gets worse. If only i was healthier myself so that i could be of help instead of a burden.